Toodsay it is. I am trying to take it in stride. Once again having to accept some harsh reality. And, well, it is oddly easier than ever.
When I first started writing, the following came out:
Never have I ever Wanted more than I think I deserve Thought I deserved more than anyone else
Certainly true. But, I got stuck there. Because, the truth is, I realized that much of what I wished would follow was untrue. I am human. I err. A lot. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. And, I have to deal with the consequences. What battles are worth fighting? How can I move forward if I do not just let it go?
I can’t seem to make a decision that is in my best interest. I try to do the right thing and end up shooting myself in the foot. I try to negotiate, I get left dangling. I finally decide to walk away and, then, comes the carrot. And, then, the thread I’m still hanging from shears against the cliff’s edge.
Maybe I should have waited longer to reach out. Maybe I can’t help but self destruct. Maybe, I don’t actually give a shit about all of the crap I keep trying to hang on to.
I have to walk away. I cannot stay. Falling into a frayed net is far riskier than putting my feet firmly on my own ground and forging my way along the road not traveled.
